Posts tagged god's plan
When "I Made a Mistake" Isn't Enough

We’re so bent on forgiveness and grace and love and the centering of these virtues that we’ve forgotten that all of these are things that must be given freely and cannot be demanded or placed as burdens. The moment forgiveness becomes a burden placed upon the abused, it ceases to be any real form of grace. Grace does not come from well-meaning friends defending and explaining the abuser’s actions, by demands that we show grace for a mistake. Grace comes from knowing the hurt and the pain caused and making a conscious choice not to forget the pain, but to make sure that pain does not define your relationship to that person any more. It takes a lot of work to get to that point.

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Unlearning Purity Culture: The Simple Complexity of God's Plan

But real life is messy. Real life, with real people created by our real God, reflects far more diversity than that simple, white evangelical plan with a yard and white picket fence could ever be. Gay people exist. Trans* people exist. People divorce. People are infertile. People choose to have sex outside of marriage. People choose to wait. People have those choices stolen from them. People grow up without mothers. Without fathers. People grow up with two dads or two moms or just one parent. People have a set of parents and then their parents’ special friend. People will never have any desire to experience sex.

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