Posts tagged privilege
I Spent Time in an Elevator with Shia LaBeouf Yesterday

It was fascinating to see how the experiment in the elevator rippled out and struggled and clashed with the institutional standard that demands things be performed in particular ways—ways that tend to cater toward white people. I mean, the Oxford Union is the place that, last year, had a drink special at the bar called the “Colonial Comeback.” So it’s a little hard to argue that it doesn’t have issues on some level, just as every institution does.

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Manners and the American Female

And this ultimately is why our metrics of politeness and kindness have to be considered carefully. For many, I’m a rude woman because I bother to open my mouth about things considered “impolite” by many. We like to think we’re beyond the world where women shouldn’t speak on politics or religion or anything in between. But in reality, we still live in a culture where a woman bothering to open her mouth is perceived as a threat of the worst kind.

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When "I Made a Mistake" Isn't Enough

We’re so bent on forgiveness and grace and love and the centering of these virtues that we’ve forgotten that all of these are things that must be given freely and cannot be demanded or placed as burdens. The moment forgiveness becomes a burden placed upon the abused, it ceases to be any real form of grace. Grace does not come from well-meaning friends defending and explaining the abuser’s actions, by demands that we show grace for a mistake. Grace comes from knowing the hurt and the pain caused and making a conscious choice not to forget the pain, but to make sure that pain does not define your relationship to that person any more. It takes a lot of work to get to that point.

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My Humanity Is Not Subject To Your Moral Reasoning

Logic or reasoning that does not contain within it an amount of empathy and humanity for the Other is logic and reasoning that has no place within the Church writ large. This is why I reject “debates” about my humanity on their face – because my humanity and my position as someone beloved by God is only up for debate in the minds of my oppressors. And oppression is not something in which the Church can engage.

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Getting Shit Done: How The Cannibal Left Is Actually A Good Thing

But if your “friends” are unwilling to listen to you, are unable to recenter your feelings even just once in awhile, they aren’t exactly friends. If your friend or your ally insists on ignoring or fighting any kind of pushback or criticism because “infighting hurts the movement” then the movement isn’t actually going to go anywhere. Indeed, the push and pull of criticism and discussion is actually the only way anything has ever actually gotten done. Critiquing our allies – like Sojourner Truth critiquing the whitness of the suffragette movement or transgender people critiquing the cisnormative nature of the LGBT rights movement – is precisely how progress is made. Ignoring those call outs, ignoring that criticism, only works to keep privileged power structures in place.

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